yuck

I still can't eat a thing-- malaise, fever, and my joints are kinda achey. but i dont think i'm going to die.

st valintin pray 4 me

yesterday i sneaked into an 'off-limits room' and ate some leaves off a plant. ever since then I have been sick. theres nothing the doctor can do, because i have made this error before (with some other plant) what is it with me and PLANTS??? My people got rid of most of the plants because of me. I am listless and almost fell down the stairs while dry heaving. I am trying to sleep it off, so I won't post for a few days. I am burning up with fever.

Get Off of My Chair

See? He was sitting ON me while I was napping-- I woke up because he weighs a ton.

Scratching Post

I have been too busy to post up til today. A new sofa was delivered just after my last post and I have been super busy sleeping on it, drooling on it, and clawing it. Here is a photo of me taken just minutes after the sofa hit my living space. I decided to start 'breaking it in' by walking on the back of it and attempting to loosen the weave with my furry little hands. This new sofa is fantastic!

Baby Picture

Here is one of my baby pictures. Who doesn't love a kitten? In this pic, I was playing in my "spaceship" it was a lot fun and amused me for hours. One day I was too big to get inside it. Later I discovered it was a salad shaking thing.
I don't know what happened to it, but I haven't seen the thing in years.

Evil Dennis is hissing at people today.
I just had a snack.
I'm going to nap now.

Le weekend Part 2

This freak stayed in his cupboard a lot this week, and much of the weekend he spent under a chair or in a closet. I think he might have Seasonal Affective Disorder. I notice he never goes for the sunbeams or windowsills--he likes to nap in some crypt-like place all day, and it was so *sunny today. The Crypt Keeper never showed his demented face until some seafood was brought into the house.

*sunny but bitter cold. Pretty snowfall last night.

Le weekend Part 1

Pretty decent weekend, no complaints!

Mysterious Toy

Actually it is a simple and fun toy, and I am building up the old arm muscles with this one. No surprise that Dennis does not understand this toy. A ball rolling in a circle is way over his head, you'd think it was quantum physics or something. He cannot work it out.
He was all set to attack me when my secretary announced "lunch is served" Big plate-o-salmon. Dennis ran off to overeat as usual and nap all afternoon.

SHOCKED!

My evil roomate has set up a Competitive Blog! He sucks! see for yourself:

http://the-anti-jeff.blogspot.com/

He gave it that name to make me mad it didn't work!

Things are NOT Good.

Here is a photo of Dennis "Crazyeyes" Conrad. He is way crazier than he looks.
That big mean uncouth selfish mean pushy angry mean bully cat tried to kill me after my last post. First he tried to sleep ON me (he is way bigger than me) then he became enraged when I tried to get away from him. I try to get along but he has mental problems. He slapped me a bunch of times, bit me, tried to strangle me, and I am not a fighter. How can I get him to respect my personal space? I was here first, and he came along 6 years ago-- pushy and annoying from day 1. He was a tiny kitten, but he grew like a cat on steriods. Too bad his brain never grew. (Tennis-Ball head) Too bad he has no empathy for others. I don't want to sound like a complainer, but I like my world predictably peaceful, with plenty of food, sunshine and serene napping.

Ten Commandments for Comfortable Cats

1. All Cats are Equal, there are no alpha cats.
2. Stay indoors or in your own yard.
3. Thou shalt not thrill kill birds, mice, and little wiggly things.
4. No biting, no fighting with other cats.
5. Thou shalt not steal another cat's food
6. Respect humans who are kind.
7. Cleverly avoid mean people.
8. Show affection to those you love.
9. Respect a good cat-lovin' vet..they are priceless.
10. Conserve energy by napping as much as possible.
and 11. always think INSIDE the box.

TGIF

It has been a pretty good day. That big mean cat has stayed in his cupboard all day, so I've been playing with my favorite toy, and lounging around the house. This toy is endlessly fascinating. I can throw it around and it seems like it can fly. It makes a crinkling noise when I bite it. Realism. I like the little crunchy sound. This toy has been with me for many years, so I thought I'd showcase it today. Little. Sentimental. Things.

Dark Spot

Everything is not perfection in
JEFFCITY. The reason:
A cat named Dennis
lives in the cupboard
above the refrigerator.
He rarely comes out,
but when he does
he annoys me. He
tries to sit on me,
he pushes me
around, and there
is nothing I can do.

BlueJeffrey

Today wasn't much of a day. I slept through most of it and had trouble with an annoying cat named Dennis.

More about Me

This portrait was done when I lived in Brooklyn, NY. I recall the day I sat for it. It was a warm summer day in June. Later I did some birdwatching. There was this Bluejay named Big Frankie, I used to watch his comings and goings. He was a connected bird, and was always up to something interesting.

Monday

Had some worker in to paint the kitchen. Disruptions make me sleepy.

Controversial

This painting, depicting me as an angel started some controversy when it was first displayed at a gallery. A group called 'Right Winged Christians Against Controversial Art" tried to ban it from the gallery show. One member of the group threw a pot of mustard at the painting, but missed it and made a mess all over the wall and floor. Very bad aim. The mustard pot nearly hit me, and I hate violence, especially when I might get hurt. I thought you might like to view the painting. I'm exhausted, must nap now. Posting really takes it out of me.

Ratty Reading

Someone asked what I am reading these days. I enjoy this story about two rats, one lives in the city, and the other lives in the country. They each have their strengths and weaknesses. I find myself wishing I could meet up with the country rat here in the city, where his weaknesses can work to my advantage. I like a book that leads one to imagine.... 'what if....'

In my real world I much prefer a well roasted, savory lamb chop to some hairy rodent who is giving me the eye as far as my dinner is concerned. If you've ever actually eaten a live rat you know it feels like you're eating a wriggling undigested hairball with a nasty, gooey center.

The thrill is more in the capture than the nosh.

But the story is tres bon, and I enjoy it. It is one of my top ten favorite books.

Snow and Hiccups

Today we got our first real dusting of snow. and I got the hiccups.
Food was so-so, nothing new. My day planner says NAP.

Genius

Sometimes I know that I am so brilliant, and it is almost scary.

My People

These are the two people who work for me: my secretary and my butler. My secretary is also what you might call my general assistant and housekeeper, and the butler does any odd jobs around the house that I tell him to do. The butler is a good cook, as well. (Thanks for that delicious duck, Jeevsie boy) I feel I am a generous and kind boss. I call the butler 'Jeeves' even though it isn't his name and I know it bothers him a lot. I call my secretary 'Mom' whenever I feel like whining and screaming for stuff. They know who is the boss of Jeff City, so there won't be any problems. They are, in a sense , "my dogs", but they are much smarter than dogs in some ways. I have ordered the best furniture to claw, shred, and nap on, and a huge bed. I hate to sleep alone, especially at night, in the dark, so I make my secretary and butler sleep on either side of me. Toasty warm in winter, too. So here's to my wonderful people: they are generally obedient and make my life a little easier.

1. About Me: Jeffrey

I have had my portrait painted numerous times.